Volunteering at Craig Hospital

As my time volunteering at Craig Hospital comes to a close (I only have three times left there before I move to Indiana), I continue to be amazed by the love, sacrifice and compassion that flows from the people that care for the patients there. A friend that I had met while I was in inpatient care there a few years ago posted this video (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nQY4dIxY1H4&ob=av2e), and it still brings me to tears. When I see the husbands, girlfriends, children, wives, fiancees, etc- caring for their loved one's in wheelchairs and in horrific circumstances because of car accidents, some rare illness, strokes, skiing accidents... I can't even get through this blog post because I am crying so hard. I don't know why this has become such an emotional topic for me, maybe it's just because I've had 4 months of my life already taken away by the hospital and don't want anymore to be taken away.

I want a love that's strong enough to withstand whatever comes my way, not just someone who's going to bail on me because something happened and has made life no longer convenient. I met a guy who's wife divorced him after his stroke. There had to be more going on beyond just that incident, but the idea devastates me. I look back on the pictures from when it happened to me, and I hate it. I hate my smile. I hate how much weight I lost in the hospital. I hate how out of control everything was for me, and how my care was up to other people FOR MONTHS. Not having control freaks me out, and it's been something I've been working on personally. I want to grow in this area. But most of all, I want a love that is strong enough to not even question when something happens, but it just takes over into care-giving. I know that's not an easy task that I'm asking for or looking for by any means, but it's become important to me because of recent events in my life. Who knows what could happen. I certainly didn't anticipate a stroke at age 28. Who knows what could happen tomorrow. I don't want to live my life in fear, but at the same time, I want to know that I would be ok if anything was ever to happen to me or the people that I love. And those are my thoughts on this emotional day of Autumn as I pack to move to Indianapolis. I can't believe with all of my preparation that is really next week now! Crazy! I love you all!
Love,
Amy Christine