I never would have known.

Those have become my new favorite words. I hear them often from people that I meet that don't know about my last 19 months of misery, and it's incredibly validating. I went to a womens gathering at my church tonight and finally got to connect with our pastor's wife, Donna, and I've just loved her spirit from afar and wanted to connect and talk to her more. Tonight, I had the opportunity to do so. I've learned in the last 19 months how to read a conversation and gently tell parts of my story if/and when the opportunity should present itself. A woman shared part of her testimony tonight- that she gave birth to a beautiful little girl in 2006 but she had a rare disease and died the same day. She said something really profound that I think I'm going to adopt for myself. "I have tragedy in my past, but it does not define who I am". Very, very wise words. After the "gathering time", we got to mingle a little bit, and Donna approached us, and as we were talking, I just felt that I should share this part of my story gently with her. "Amy, I never would have known" was what she shared with me. For my friends who knew me pre-stroke, struggled with me over the last 19 months, and are still standing by my side- THANK YOU. Your presence means SO MUCH to have stuck with me over the long haul. Truly, I am grateful beyond words. But for these new wonderful people who I've been mutually blessed by knowing in the last year and a half, thank you, and thank you for the kind words of "I never would have known" That just means SO MUCH, because in my mind, I'm thinking "but how could you NOT notice _____?" I'm quickly figuring out that those are lies to keep me in bondage and not share the comfort and compassion that I have received from Above. There is going to be a purpose for all of this refining, right?
Love,
Amy Christine