My glass is all full

My counselor shared with me a great little analogy last week during our session (and by the way, I know I have irrational thoughts and I'm not afraid to share that I'm going to a counselor for help- especially since that's what I'm in school for!). Anywhoo... she shared about a friend who left her bible study because "it was too negative". Another friend that stayed in the Bible study said "well, my glass is all full, just maybe with stuff she doesn't want to hear about". I feel like that's my life. My glass is all full, but maybe some people don't want to hear about the trials or things that go wrong. I'm sorry, I just can't "think positively" and make the bad stuff stop happening. If you don't want to hear the bad stuff too, then maybe I shouldn't share anything with you then if it's going to be too hard for you to hear what He's up to- the good and the bad. Having my mom out here was great and I loved having her here, but I asked her and she said that since my stroke, she had noticed that I tended to have a negative outlook on everything (and I know she'll be reading this too. Love You Mom!) My outlook isn't so much negative as it is a healthy all-encompassing view of life. It's not so much that I have a negative outlook or I'm waiting for bad things to happen, but they do happen and I'm going to speak about them the same way I do about the positive things. I can't just think positive thoughts when I have to buy 4 new tires for my car when I'm living off a VERY meager budget. Good thoughts aren't just going to make that money appear. Trust me- I've thought "good thoughts" for a sugar daddy to appear... and I'm still single.

Life is hard, especially when living the way that I am- nearing the end of graduate school, living among an amazing community, an intense internship, and living off of SSDI for income. It's humbling to say, but I really can't do it all on my own. Maybe that was one of God's reason's for bringing the stroke into my life- so I could admit that I can't do it alone and without Him. Maybe this was all for more reliance on Him, because I didn't really live like I needed Him before. If anything, the stroke has certainly taught me to live each day and look to him- financially, spiritually, physically, emotionally... it's all His. So I guess I'm healthily learning that my glass is ALL FULL- the good, the bad, and the ugly. It includes the things that we don't want to talk about or acknowledge. And those are my random thoughts for this morning :) Thanks for continuing to follow along 18.5 months later ;)
With Love,
Amy Christine